crash into me

2002-12-12T15:54:00.000-08:00

Take me down, six underground, the ground beneath your feet
so i dont even kow if this works anymore. but whatever.

i think its funny that, when im angry or frustrated or sad, i blast my music as though im thinking that it will be louder than my stressful thoughts. but it helps.

it sucks that i am a big fat slacker in school. but you know what, i worked my ass off the past 3 years, so i think i can try and take a break this year. but its still annoying to fail tests much too often.

the cold weather brings back memories. good and bad. i love the holiday season.

2002-10-23T15:53:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to keep my feet on the ground, I'm getting to like this feeling I've found

I'm getting to love the thought of having you around. and I will never let you down

love. i am in love with that song.
so i have been told that my blog is broken. and from my experience it is. but i will keep updating anyways JUST IN CASE a miracle happens and it decides to actually post my damn entrees. it hasn't posted the last 6 blogs. fucker.

school is absurd, but life is good.
i have decided that winter is the season of love for me. real nice memories from last year but fun and new experiences this year. trying to cherish every bit of high school that i can while i'm still there [but dont get me wrong, because 99% of the time i absolutely detest school]. there is so much to do for college.....oye

today we ditched 6th and went in toris hot tub and ate chips and pop corn. good times!

2002-10-12T18:39:00.000-07:00

Won't you take me by the hand, take me somewhere new

lizzy, this blog's for you, baby.
i am a busy girl. school has taken over and is on the verge of destroying my well-being. but i will not surrender! i'll just suffer in the interval.... waaaa :-(
i am in love with every one of the dancers in mind tricks, my teacher's breaking group. they are called mind tricks and they are spectacular. and the guys are so personable and happy and full of energy. they weren't afraid to be goofy and get to know us and it made me feel good and special. and they are SO talented. love in my heart for dancers. i hope i can be a dancer for a very long time. that would be ideal.
so the dance trip was fun, despite the midnight - 3 a.m. rehearsal and getting up 4 hours later, but you know it was worth it.

and as a sidenote: fuck SAT I and II's.

a boy brought me cookies last night and it made me really happy. what are you supossed to say to someone who brings you cookies at 10 pm the night before SATs? thank you just doesn't seem good enough.

i hat homework with a deep burning passion in my heart. once i have gotten acceptance letters to college, come second semester i will be a BIG FAT SLACKER.

2002-10-06T23:23:00.000-07:00

I shit you not. There is no poop coming out of here right now

-danny

i love danny for making me laugh until i cry.

next time somebody asks me why i got sick, im going to say it was my homework's fault. because it usually is, considering it forces me to stay up late and therefore doesn't allow my poor body to get the rest it needs in order for me to be a healthy girl.

did i meantion i love john mayer???

i miss my grandma and my grandpa and my friends.

and what's with all this works cited bullshit?? what ever happened to just plain old bibliographies??? ARGH. anger.

2002-10-05T01:29:00.000-07:00

Back to you, it always comes around

old friends are like medicie to my heart. i really miss evryone i saw today for the first time in years. it is strange to think that after we graduate, it wont be that easy to just go and visit them at school; all i will have left of them is memories. weird.
laughing is also medicine to my herat. especially laughing with old friends about old and new memories.

and sleeping is medicine to my ever weakening immune system.

and hi to matt steiner, if you are readin this ;-) hi to anyone from chaminade that is reading this.

2002-09-29T15:08:00.000-07:00

Break Away

i am desperately in love with john mayer.

if meoldy is my destiny
then whats left of me i’ll give to you
if next to me is all that you need to be
would you settle for fantasy
if its the best you could do
can i have my cake
can i have you too
would you follow me
could i ask you to
would a world between us
break these ties
we’ve worked so hard to realize
can a post card say what i see in your eyes
could i ever break away
would i be satisfied and find peace inside
rollin half my life over broken white lines
can i have my cake
can i have you too
would you follow me
could i ask yoou to you to
will i wake up one morning
and see your face
and the streaks on the window
that the rainstorm makes
could you bare all the waiting
and the strength that it takes
could i ever break away
could i ever break away
can i have my cake
can i have you too
would you follow me
could i ask you to
would a world between us
break these ties
we’ve worked so hard to realize
can a post card say what i see in your eyes
could i ever break away
could i every break away
away, away

2002-09-29T01:41:00.000-07:00

And tomorrow it's back to bein friends, but tonight we're lovers

i have no idea what this feeling is that i have right now but i really really hate it. i can't even explain what i feel... like i am easily agrivated with certain people and really want to be around certain people and really want something when i know that in a couple days or minutes or so i won't feel the same way about it anymore. but then it always tends to pop back up again and tease me in a mean mean way. i hate my broken car and i am sick of the color of my walls in my room. let alone my room itself. i am sick of my love life, or lack there of. i am tired of not being able to listen to a favorite cd because it reminds me too much of something that i shouldn't think about again because if i did it would break me into pieces and spit me in the dirt to rot.
i am so ready to get out of high school but when i finally do i know i'll realize how much i'm going to miss everyone. i love that danielle and i are so alike but so different. and we love how we can hang out with each other every day and never get sick of it or get annoyed with each other.
i think my life has a love/hate relationship with itself. not necisarrily my life, but several occurrances and situations within my life in general.
love and hate. those are some words that are constantly seeming to spurt out of my lack of vocabulary.

2002-09-25T21:00:00.000-07:00

Let tomorrow come and take my time away

i just thought i'd share this with you because i liked it. its from www.inpassing.org. everyone should go to it. i love this website. anyways so here it is:
"Just because you love doesn't mean that love loves you." (thats the quote i liked)
"Robot loves you."
--Written on the wall of the bathroom in Barrows Hall

its funny to me that when i know i have homework i try to get as far away from it as possible until i know that i have negative time left to do it. i also dont think i am going to get a homecoming date. but you know, it's all good in my hood.

2002-09-23T20:29:00.000-07:00

My fever burns me deeper than I've ever shown to you

oh what drama i have experienced. what stupid ridiculous DRAMA!!! it is ending soon.... i hope. i took innitiative in trying to resolve it tonight and i think [i hope] that its working. it is about stupid homecoming and how the best friend and the ex are going together. but to tell you the truth i'd rather not talk about it. so the end for now. things will be good!!!! i hope. just cross your fingers for me please. thanks.

i hate this heat in my house and the homework i am being given. and I HATE ECON.

danielle and i have been talking about our europe trip next summer non stop and it keeps getting more exciting every time we discuss it. i love danielle. we are going to have so much fun. yay for europe!

2002-09-20T23:48:00.000-07:00

Won't you take me by the hand, take me somewhere new

i really don't understand what satisfaction i get from coming online at random times merely to see whos on, check my mail, delete my porn mail, and look at the mail that i am still too lazy to respond to. the fact that i do it like 3 times or more a day is even more unessicary and stupid. oh well. now it is worth while though because mexico friend is on.

i like spending time with friends you haven't spent time with in a while. i hate being in a situation where you want to hang out with people in 2 certain groups, however 1 of the people in each of those certain groups you don't want to be around at all because of particular reasons, such as they stopped paying attention to you after a while of being good friends. but then you don't know who you want to be with, so you just don't want to be with anyone, so then you are confused and annoyed and are probably irritating your friends who are driving you around...... so anyways....

headaches suck

2002-09-17T22:10:00.000-07:00

Ain't no sunshine when she's gone

it is so sad and annoying and DISAPPOINTING when someone calls or IMs you and you are SO excited because you think it might be someone who you were hoping would call/IM you, but then you find out its not. especially when you are hoping that it is the waiter from mexico. blast it all.....

should i be letting it bother me that my best friend is going to homecoming with my ex boyfriend???..... because it is. :(

let me just explain to everyone how hot it is in this house right now. well i can't really explain it. but it's quite uncomfortabley hot.

2002-09-17T12:03:00.000-07:00

Stop looking at me swan.

i find it awkward how my current sickness gives me sharp pains in certain areas of my back for a certain period of time, and then it transfers to somewhere else in my back. not to meantion my neck and legs and head are also in an excessive amount of pain. cool huh!

it was funny today how i went to school for the first 2 periods to take a test, and within the one 15 minute break we had before i left to go back home, 3 people confronted me about my appearance today. one said, 'sasha you look like shit, are you ok?' another said, 'you look weird today...are you wearing different makeup or something?' [which i wasn't, in fact i just had normal mascara on that i wear every day]. the last said, 'you look really like...tired or something.' it is nice of people to point out your imperfections to your face.

i am now going to take advantage of my time at home and watch tv.

2002-09-15T17:45:00.000-07:00

Didn't have a camera by my side this time

one of the most wonderful experiences in life is being able to look at beautiful things, like pink and orange sunsets and leaves falling from trees and the ocean. those are three of the things that make me realize how happy i am to be alive.

the whole thing about not being able to eat when you're sick really SUCKS because if you eat you feel sick afterwards but if you don't eat you feel sick because you're stomache is empty. so it's just all one big mess. bah

i have been talking a lot today about how weird it is going to be leaving for college. it's just strange how everyone is going to be going completely seperate ways so soon. everyone will meet new people and have new lives and so many people who are friends or just acquaintances at school will never be apart of our lives anymore. it makes me feel really weird. but excited at the same time.

my mom is cooking dinner and it smells really good. too bad i'm so hungry that im not even hungry anymore. im angry. and my head is spinning. feels great.

2002-09-14T17:10:00.000-07:00

I don't want that kind of forever in my life anymore

i hate feeling sick because you want to be productive but you can't because all you really can do is lay down. and when you smell something good you really want to eat it but you can't because you feel sick. :/

i love talking to friends who you absolutely adore but never get to see anymore. my friend is homeschooling now and i just talked to him online and i miss the shit out of him. my friend that i met in mexico and my friend from l.a. also called me today and it just makes you feel so good inside, know what i mean? i love my friends.

i also hate when you call people and then you have no idea who you called so when someone answers the phone you don't know what to say. actually its kind of funny..... i also hate when people are pressuring you to like someone when you are so unsure of your feelings. and then you feel like a bitch when you don't like them because you are letting people down. i try not to pay attention to those people who are pestering me about it but it's still ANNOYING AS ALL HELL. augh.

my head hurts :*(

2002-09-12T16:07:00.000-07:00

Here's a toast to all those who knew me all too well

today on the way home from school my brother and i saw the most ADORABLE thing i've ever layed eyes on. it was an old lady with white hair wearing a bright pink helmet riding a little bright pink bicycle with a little basket in front. it was the most wonderful thing ever. when i'm old i am going to get a pink bicylce and be like that lady i saw today. she is my hero.

i met a foreign exchange student at our school from belgium and he is so cool. i make him speak french to me and i try to speak to him, even though i suck, but it's so much fun. i love his accent and i love learning about his culture, it's tight.

i am in love with my hip hop class. i look forward to going to it every week. i love my teacher and i love my friends in the class and i love dancing. i am so happy to have dance in my life. the end.

we are going to ireland this summer to sing in our school choir and i am the most excited person in the world.

i took my senior pictures today. cross my fingers for me that they turn out somewhat decent.

2002-09-08T01:13:00.000-07:00

Dream is destiny

the movie 'waking life' is very overwhelming but so interesting. i kind of got lost in a couple scenes because it is so hard to grasp every single piece of the dialogue, but the parts that i did understand were so intense and out of this world but yet so logical at the same time. the movie is basically about how life is so closely compared to the state of being in a dream. they explained things about reincarnation and how it is impossible but i didnt quite understand that part all the way, and they explained how evolution is happening in such short amounts of time lately that soon evolution will occur within the time spand of a day and that there will be nothing else to study in life except truth and love, and therefore there will no longer be violence or hate. they talked about the difference between film and literature and the imagination that goes along with words versus the nonimagination that is carried along in films because the character is being shown to you in front of your very eyes instead of you having to picture him/her/it yourself. they explained how a dream world can be an entire different dimention, and how people live their lives basically waiting to enter Heaven and to enter eternity and are saying no their entire lives until they die and say yes and accept that they want to enter eternity, and how when you die there is still a dream state which you enter before you reach real death. too many theories for one night and too much information for my mind to process. i now have a completely different perspective on dreams. i don't even know what to think. it's just WEIRD. what if this all is dream?? shit i have to stop thinking before i drive myself to the point of insanity. whoever wrote that script is increadibly, realistically knowledgable. and creepy.

ever notice how when you think you don't really miss people all that much and then you see them you realize that you really miss spending time with them? i hung out with some friends tonight that i used to hang out with every day during summer and haven't seen for a couple weeks and it was really nice to have dinner and watch a cracked out movie and just talk with them tonight. especially talking about our ideas about the movie. there just seemed like there was so much to discuss afterwards and it was nice to actually have a civil conversation about it. but its also nice to be able to ditch the civil stuff and still be able to have a good time just screwing around like stupid teenagers. such as anthony, who walks into the video store with a wig on his head speaking in some sort of a foreign accent. that's quality entertainment right there for you.

i really hope i get all this college crap done in time to actually apply to them. and the stress begins....it does suck, but i'd actually rather be stressing about school rather than be stressing about school AND my discombobulated love life at the same time. that just doesn't work.

oh and im over him by the way. over mr stupidhead that is. thank you, thank you, you've been a wonderful audience tonight.
however that doesn't mean that i can't still miss the good times.

i still miss mexico.

2002-09-04T16:06:00.000-07:00

Take a shower and shine your shoes, you got no time to lose

why is it that i always wind up stubbing my already broken toe????? augh, it hurts. :(
thank goodness for music

2002-09-03T20:14:00.000-07:00

Forgive me love, I can't turn and walk away

congradulate me on getting through my first day of senior year. my last 1st day of high school ever. my brother drove me to school for the first time ever today. i like not trying to fix my hair and drive at the same time. its nice. its really too bad i like didn't sleep last night... why is it that you can never get a good nights sleep on the night before school? hm.....
i hate homework. you will be hearing that quite freaquently from me. i apoligize in advance.

2002-09-02T19:38:00.000-07:00

Close your eyes, count backwards

rewind --- i would just like to say that even though i hate school i am really lucky to have had one of the best summers ever. i am luck to have had so many good previous summers. i just felt guilty that i kept complaining about school when really i should feel grateful to be living. SUMMER WAS AWESOME. life is good. no matter what.
so the end.

2002-09-02T19:33:00.000-07:00

I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

tomorrow = school = my DOOM. at least its the last year.....lets hope i make it a good one. at the end of the year i'll realize that i'll actually miss people. but right now i dont miss anyone. i just dont want summer to end. im not ready for work and stress. AUGH

i think one of the worst feelings in the world is missing people. even if they aren't far away. it sucks. school sucks.

it is dreadfully hot. i am in love with my pool right now. its like the greatest feeling ever right now to just slip into my freezing cold pool. nice and relaxing. unlike school.

can you tell i don't want to go to school???

2002-08-31T13:50:00.000-07:00

Viva la Mexico

I HAD SO MUCH FUN IN MEXICO. i miss my friends and the sexy waiter i met. im in that sucks-to-be-home phase again. i am just really ready for a change. i want to remodel my room and my wardrobe and myself. i want to meet new people. but don't get me wrong i still love all the old people [not literally old in age, old as in i have known them for longer... you know what i mean..]. its just really cool how much a person can learn and experience in one week. i love it.

school countdown: 3 days.

3 days until i am a senior. oh wow i hate school.

i spent my entire paycheck yesterday. but i am now equiped with cute stuff.

i love noticing details about kids that resemble their parents. in the way they look and act. its so cool how similar they can be.

i miss mexico. i dont miss school

2002-08-19T23:56:00.000-07:00

Wake me up before you go go, don't leave me hangin' on like a yo yo

another ugly night! 2 in a row. that sucks. i don't know what the hell is bothering me so much.... people are just really easily getting on my nerves. at least i am getting away from everything again. parents planned a last minute trip to puerto villarta in mexico, we're leaving at like 3:30 in the morning in 2 days. my boss is royally pissed. i am royally pleased.

i love how little kids never match their clothes. they just wear whatever the hell they want and they don't care about getting dirty or acting weird. they are just so carefree. i miss that about being little. what i wouldn't give to be carefree right now....

2002-08-19T00:23:00.000-07:00

One time I drank too much cough syrup and everything turned blue

-Nick

i have funny friends. i am going to start writing down deep thoughts and funny quotes that i hear just for shits and giggles so i can look them up when i'm 30 and laugh at myself.

something is missing tonight. you know that feeling where you just feel empty and shitty. i felt like i needed a friend to go to tonight to cheer me up, but then i felt like i didn't have anyone to go to. i want a boyfriend tonight. i felt like a stupid boring person tonight. i felt irritated with the buddy-buddy-ness of my friends tonight. tonight was kind of a self esteem downer. tonight i will go to sleep and hopefully wake up somewhat more pleasant in the morning.

i want to go back to the john mayer concert!

2002-08-17T13:00:00.000-07:00

It's just a big party is what this is all is.... except we're the people on the deck 'cause that's where the cool mothafuckers hang out

John Mayer is a hillarious person. and he is such a talented musician. and not just his singing voice, but his speaking voice is SO sexy. there is something increadibly sexy about a man with a guitar. just the thrill of going to his concert completely unprepared and the satisfaction of seeing him live was one of my lifes many greater experiences.

it was so funny the way we went about getting tickets. lauren and i drove to berkley not even knowing how to get to the greek theatre or what time it started. butwe bought them from a scalper and didn't get arrested! it was worth every penny [and it was more than $60, but i don't really care...i try not to think about it].

the vibe from the people in the concert was so encouraging and felt so good, everyone was singing along and smiling. he took this one girls camera on stage with him and took a picture of himself for her. i hate that girl. i dont really hate her but you know what i mean. i loved hearing his quirky thoughts and ideas... like he was talking about that feeling you get when you're so bummed out about something that it leads you on to other things that bum you out and then you don't even know what bummed you out in the first place. and he was talking about the way that certain things look when they're in a group... like he said when there is a group of girls with tan legs and tank tops you aren't looking at one girl you are looking at the group as a whole [well for me it would be guys], and when you walk into subway its not the smell of one food that smells so good but all the smells together. i love that thought. he uses big words and talks quickly and cracks jokes.

i love the feeling of frustration you get when you are listening to this increadible music and you are so happy that you don't know what to do with yourself. its the greatest feeling inside of your body and i wish i could keep it forever because that was one of the best concerts i've ever been to. and everyone his cd does not do him justice whatsoever! he is honestly 100 times better live.

3 cheers for john mayer.

i love music.

2002-08-16T11:59:00.000-07:00

Would you want me when I'm not myself?

everyone wish me luck on getting john mayer tickets tonight. lauren and i are taking are chances and driving down to berkley hoping that there will either be 2 tickets left at the box office [however it is a sold out concert...] or that we can scalp 2 tickets for less than $60. so cross your fingers for us!

danielle is back from bali and that makes me happy because i missed her a lot. it was weird not talking to her and seeing her every day like i'm used to. but now she's back and she brought me beautiful balinese stuff, like a hand beaded shell belt, a lovely hand painted scarf, pretty earings, and incense inside this cyllander made of leaves [yes, real leaves, its like the coolest thing i've ever owned]. i love her.

and im off.

2002-08-13T12:17:00.000-07:00

You could never be a vegetable. Even artichokes have hearts.

not to get all deep on everyone, but i think one of the reasons that i love the movie "Amelie" so much is because i feel like i can completely relate with every emotion that she experienes throughout the film. such as how she wants so bad to do good for people, and how she gets so frustrated with falling in love. especially the part when she melts into a puddle of water, i have felt that way so many times and that just illustrates it perfectly. and then the entire movie just gives me a more positive outlook on life... i have never felt so happy after watching a movie before! it makes me want to fall in love. GOSH I JUST LOVE IT THE END.

2002-08-12T00:59:00.000-07:00

There's no such thing as brass nails, is there?

i think i am getting fat. i need to #1 get off my arse and do something cardiovascular and #2 stop eating all the ice cream from work. hah, yeah right, would YOU turn down free ice cream? i didn't think so....

GOD I LOVE MY CAT.

i miss my friends andi miss dancing.

i am dreading the next couple weeks when i will be having to get ready for school and start saying bye to all my friends who are leaving for college. oye vay.... goodbyes can die....

2002-08-10T13:42:00.000-07:00

Tell me somethin good

i have decided that i need to start writing captions that pertain to my blog. however i am #1 not that creative and #2 not that patient to think of one that actually has to do with what i'm going to be writing about. so anyways how bout them dodgers......

i miss the boy i met in catalina.

i have also decided that my blog is INCREADIBLY plain and boring and i would spice it up however i am #1 again, not that patient and #2 not THAT computer literate in terms of website designing. therefore it will stay plain and simple until someone who knows how to make things snazzy can help me fix it up a bit. so you're just going to have to deal with it.

i really DON'T want school to start.

it is SO hot.

LOVE caps lock.

2002-08-06T20:24:00.000-07:00

Can't buy me love, everbody tells me so

Can't buy me love, no no no, nooooo

-The Beatles

so now i am moping around my house wishing i was back with my friends again. i hate that post just-had-a-really-good-trip-and-don't-want-to-come-home stage. i hate the anti-socialness of myself. bah. humbug.

jane, let me tell you, you crack me up.

and now for a great quote from my good friend robert:
"I'm critical of everything that's not good."

2002-08-05T19:43:00.000-07:00

And I'm thinkin what a mess we're in

Hard to know where to begin

-jamiriquai

catalina was a blast. amen. i have the greatest friends in the world!

and i love dancing. i love it i love it i LOVE IT. it soothes the soul. fo sho. it just felt GOOOOD to get away from stupid life for a while and just dance. so hard to put it into words. just fuckin love it.

cute boys are cute. and thats that.

boring blog, sorry, promise to spice it up later. PEACE OUT.

2002-07-27T12:10:00.000-07:00

I'm leavin on a jet plane; don't know when I'll be back again

Oh babe, I hate to go

im leaving tomorrow for los angeles to dance at a convention. i am a LITTLE BIT excited. its going to be awesome.

i love kayaking! everyone go kayaking! it is good times for everyone!

i think i got bit by some weird bug and I CAN'T STOP ITCHING AELKTJA;WLEMRT;KWLAMV;LKA i am in pain :(

it's a bad feeling thinking that he doesn't care about me. makes my heart cry.

one of the things i enjoy most in life is staying up late and having great conversations with people that you don't know very well. it's cool knowning that you are on the same level about a lot of things, even though you aren't very close.

catalina is getting closer every day....

2002-07-22T13:35:00.000-07:00

-"Can you Move?"
-"Move? You're alive. If you want, I can fly."

-from the movie "the princess bride"

i like that quote because i am one of the many pathetic hopeless romantics out there.

it is annoying to me that we haven't spoken for the majority of summer when he wrote in my yearbook that we would hang out so much this summer and he would make up for him being stupid. so much for that. why can't we all just get along? I JUST WANT TO BE FRIENDS auuggghhh.

did i mention that i hate zits?

i wish i didn't feel tired right now. i want energy. maybe i'll go run. or swim.

2002-07-19T17:20:00.000-07:00

See I may have faith to make mountains fall

but if I lack love, than I have nothing at all

-I LOVE LAURYN HILL

last night - SMOKIN' GROOVES CONCERT . oh my goodness i had so much fun. jurassic 5, lauryn hill, the roots, and outkast. i'd never smelt so much weed in my entire life as i did at that concert. i think you got high just standing there. after the concert we went to carrows and had ourselves an extremely great time.

i hate zits.

it's a sad feeling to know that summer is more than halfway over. :*( it's a happy feeling to know that catalina is near....

i love the goofiness and carefreeness of my friends. i think that good advice to follow is that you cannot make yourself be loved. i think that having an awesome conversation with a good friend beats kissing a boy any day. i think that music can make a huge difference in peoples' lives. i also think that crushlink.com sucks and ice cream is good. i think a lot.

2002-07-17T00:50:00.000-07:00
i love cute underwear and i HATE cute expensive clothing

2002-07-17T00:33:00.000-07:00

Dream as if you'll live forever...

Live as if you'll die today

-james dean

my friend wrote that to me in a letter and i like it a lot. i am definitely a dreamer....

work = extreme pain in feet and wrists. HOWEVER..., work = $$$. bah

if only he cared.....

i hate that i have low self-esteem. and i hate sunburns.

i need chapstick, a hardcore massage, and a hug.

2002-07-14T19:32:00.000-07:00

And you put my brain in overload

I can't change gears; I cannot sleep

-radiohead

i am officially an employed worker at cold stone creamery. ugh, work.

i have good times at the river. however i'm scared that one day the rope swing will break and someone will just eat it and fall on their face in the shallow part of the river. but for now i will enjoy my times on it.

i got hit in the lip with a stick today. i came up out of the water after flying off the rope swing and right as my head popped up, this guy threw a stick for his dog to fetch and it coincidentally hit my lip. 3 cheers for a fat lip!

friend drama sucks. girls nights rock my world. no boys to worry about.

i love the sound the rocks make when you drop them in the water. same with bubbles that you blow underwater. it sounds like drums. i love the peacefullness underwater. sometimes i wish i could just stay underwater for awhile and escape all the stupidity in this world.

2002-07-10T12:28:00.000-07:00

"I am very very sneaky"

-the butler from 'mr. deeds'

that quote is not funny at all if you have not seen the movie. it is definitely hilarious.

my favorite part of the week was #1 staying at casey's nice fresh clean fluffy good-smelling house and #2 in the morning at casey's when nicole busted through her door and yelled at us to get out of bed and go to the beach with her.

i have finished the first harry potter and am now on the second! i feel proud.

i wish that a certain friend of mine knew how much i cared about them. it sucks thinking that they do not care about me. i also wish i could make my grandma happy.

2002-07-01T13:36:00.000-07:00

When I am down and I am blue, all I have to do is close my eyes and think of you

and the world is new

-save ferris

well this is encouraging! jeez louise

which song of staywhatyouare are you? find
out!

i love how i said i was going to read today, and i am sitting here doing nothing on my computer. so now i am going to get off and read. ok? ok. fantastic.

2002-06-30T15:57:00.000-07:00

Royal oil common bubble and boil, slap a dagger make you stagger like a hot tin foil

-mighty mighty bosstones

summer is hot. boy oh boy.
awkwardness can die. it is just a really annoying thing. bah
today i napped on the raft in my pool. today i am going to paint my nails bright pink. today has GOT to be 100 degrees.

good feeling: when it is burning hot outside and you walk in an air conditioned room and the breeze just like wraps around you. so nice.

my blogs are boring! sorry

2002-06-25T17:30:00.000-07:00

sometimes in order to see the light, we have to risk the dark

-from the movie 'minority report' [sorry if i quoted that incorrectly]

that is such a bad ass movie. see it.
i HATE when you are trying to reach someone ALL DAY and either their phone is off the hook or they are never home and their parents don't give them messages. especially when you REALLY need to talk to that person. aieeee.
and i HATE the feeling after getting in a STUPID arguement with a friend and then not being able to talk it over because we are too stubborn. and then i always give in a call before he calls me because i hate being bitter. and then i always wind up apoligizing for things HE should be sorry for. and then i just feel like he is losing respect for me because i am being an idiot. but he is being an idiot too. let's face it everyone WE'RE ALL A BUNCH OF IDIOTS. a;lwekjrta;lwjekfwa;oimtwa;ioefg;aietjwalkejtalekt anger anger anger.

does $50 for babysitting 3 kids for 8 hours sound like a rip off to you??? because it does to me. >:[ i wonder if my mom would miss any of her dishes, because i would highly enjoy breaking ALL OF THEM right now.

2002-06-23T13:07:00.000-07:00

Would you be my Forever?

-ben harper

'forever' is a beautiful song.
things i love about summer:
staying up late on weeknights, sleeping in, hot days, laying out by my pool, going over to friends houses during the middle of the day and doing nothing, walking around my house in my bathing suit, going to the river, wednesday night market, meeting new people, vacations, CATALINA, beautiful moons and sunsets, watching tv and not worrying about having homework to finish, that is all i can think of for now.

2002-06-21T11:33:00.000-07:00

This magic moment, it took my by surprise

I knew that you felt it too, by the look in your eyes

i learned that self-control and strong morals are very valuable characterstics to have, because last night i momentarily let go of mine, and although i loved it and hated it at the same time, i am still ashamed at myself. and it doesn't have to do with drugs. just to let you know.
i also learned that it is ok to forgive people for doing stupid things. because sometimes you can't control the way you feel and your actions towards those feelings. i can forgive myself as well. but i can also slap myself in the face a couple times before i do so.
friends are valuable people that you should take care of and love no matter what, because you know what's on the inside, despite their sporadic and utter stupidity that shows on the outside.

oreo milkshakes are really good. i and love soapbox revolt. and i really have no energy to clean my room.

2002-06-19T12:17:00.000-07:00

You can't get in the way of what I'm feelin

-jill scott

go to www.wearethelocals.com and download their music and look at the pictures. the lead singer is extremely good looking and they are REALLY really good. just thought i'd inform everyone.

i have concluded that you can't get around dusting your dressers without picking the objects on your dressers up before you dust, because when you attempt to dust around them, you just knock them over.

2002-06-18T23:46:00.000-07:00

Back to you, it always comes around, back to you, I try to forget you, I try to stay away, but it's too late

Over you, I'm never over, over you, there's something about you, it's just the way you move, the way you move me
- john mayer

that is my scenario.

thank God for music.

she is back on the attack. and she brought the old heartache back with her, the one that i thought i finally let go of. but NOOOOO, she just HAD to show up again and ruin my road to succuss, my road to being over him. she just had to show up and make him miss her., while i have been here and can't even get him to think of me when i'm standing right in front of him. fucker. :*(

i love summer. i hope i can make this a happy summer. i hope i don't let him ruin me. that would be ultimately pathetic. not that i already am.

but when someone calls you beautiful, and no one has made you feel that beautiful before, and you think that someone is beautiful too, how could you not want that back? it is the best feeling in the world.
it hurts.
i am a whiney bastard. i apoligize. AAARRRRRGGGHHH. one day....

i dominate mario kart.

catalina: approximately 1 month and 3 weeks. which means approximately 1 month and 3 weeks until the ULTIMATE happiness.

2002-06-16T12:57:00.000-07:00

Wish I could frame you and this feeling on the wall to stare at 'til there is no time

-hanson

It could all be so simple, but you'd rather make it hard. Loving you is like a battle, and we both end up with scars

.....'Cause no one loves you more than me, and no one ever will

-lauryn hill

even my mom knew what was wrong and i didn't have to say ONE word. not one. she can see right through me. kinda weird.

i have diagnosed myself with a love sick disease. symptoms include: patheticness, jealousy to the point of internal combustion, sporadic [and much unwanted] breakdowns [which lead to headaches], extreme confusion, weakness, and helplessness. it's really no fun, and really hard to get rid of, because there is no medicine. none that i can think of, anyways... maybe time and space, but i am too fickle to keep myself away. ooooooh jeez, me and my stupid broken heart.
thank God for my dance friends who are willing to hold me when i cry.

one day i will be over him and i will be laughing at myself and regretting that i let it get to me.

on a happier note, SUMMER IS HERE.

2002-06-13T15:08:00.000-07:00

There's only us, there's only this, forget regret, or life is yours to miss

no other road, no other way, no day but today

-Rent

summer coutndown: ONE MORE DAY BABY

i hate saying goodbyes :*( im definitely no good at it. if i am crying this year for all the seniors who are leaving, think of what next year will be like when I'M the one who's leaving all my friends. hoooooo boy.... one more year to live it up. fo sho.

i love the rent cd. everyone buy it. now. its exquisite.

an ambulance had to come and take my friend to the hospital today. i dont know what happened...neither does anyone else: one minute she was fine, and the next she couldn't even stand. she fell on the ground and she was shaking all over and she couldn't talk straight either. it was really really really scary. everyone pray that she is OK.

i can't belive school is almost over..... there is so much happiness inside my body right now that i think i might explode. and then there is the saddness for the people i will never see again. oooh life, such a strange thing....

2002-06-10T23:55:00.000-07:00

Fantasy is what we want, but Reality is what we need

-lauryn hill

summer countdown: 4 days
stress level: above normal
sleep deprevation: above normal
happiness for summer: above normal

i love getting nice messages in yearbooks. i just love it. and as much as i hate sweating in this heat, i think i would much rather be hot than freezing cold. when you're cold it feels like you can't move. know what i mean?

everyone get lauryn hill's unplugged CD. its all acoustic. and its all beautiful. i have nothing but love for her. nothing but love. love, what a glorious thing....sleep, what a glorious thing....

2002-06-08T00:40:00.000-07:00

Lost for you I'm so lost for you, for me, come and crash into me

-the dave matthews band

summer countdown: 5 school days

another funny joke: what do you call a Fish without an 'eye'? -----Fsssshhh (actually, the correct grammar would be 'without an I, but if you write that out then it wouldn't be funny, so yeah.....oh nevermind)

even though the whole yearbook signing thing can be really annoying, it is also a really nice time of year when everyone gets to spill their guts, know what i mean? i am going to miss my senior friends :( it's going to be soooo weird leavnig next year.... but SOOOO ridiculously cool because i will be out of high school. oh fo sho.
mr. stupidhead wrote a very nice message in my yearbook.

and mr. prom date supossudly wants to tell me how he feels about me sometime soon..... help. :( please don't let me break his heart. just be prepared to slap me if i do. really hard.

the powderpuff football game was today and it was sooooo out of control. hardcore brawls wound up breaking out and the po-po were going nuts and kids got arrested and it was just really lame because people start shit and fight for no aparent reason. but the game was awesome and we kicked ass :)

so the next week will be hardcore studying AND dance rehearsals, until 10, every night during the week of finals, not to meantion shows thursday-sunday. COOL HUH. :/ i like dancing, just not during finals week. throw me a nice funeral, please.
so if this isn't updated for a week, you'll know why. not that anyone cares very much... i was just letting you know.

i was going to describe this variety show type thing that we have at our school every year called anything goes, and we went tonight, and it was SO FUNNY, but then i realized that if i described it, it probably wouldn't even be funny to you, because you would've have to have been there to understand, so im not going to describe it. but i will say that it was absolutely hilarious and we have some REALLY talented musicians and singers at our school. and i love it. yay for music.

oh boy im tired.

2002-06-05T21:49:00.000-07:00

Maybe someday I will tell you when I'm in the mood to lose my way

But let me say you should have seen that sunrise with your own eyes, it brought me back to life

-john mayer

summer countdown: 7 days

math joke of the day, by zack:
what do you get when you cross a penis with a potato?? ----dictator [or dicktater]
what do you get when you cross glasses with a potato?? ----a spectator

imagine this: walking through jello, only it is jello that is baking in an oven in the firey pits of hell. now times that by 10 and that is how hot it was today. we poured water on ourselves at school. after a hip-hop class i taught at my dance studio, we all went outside and had a big water fight.
water bottle: $1.
water fight with 10, 11 and 12 year olds: priceless.

as i read sappy break up poems i wrote in the aftermath of mr. stupidhead, i began losing a great deal of respect for myself. i am just.......pathetic. but its ok to be in love, right? and its ok for it to hurt sometimes, right? i guess nothing can be proven right or wrong these days....

i am grateful for my pool.

2002-06-02T00:26:00.000-07:00

The clock never stops, never stops, never waits

He's growin old, it's gettin late

-ben folds

ben folds reminds me of good times back in the day when things were extremely awesome. well i mean, not that they sometimes aren't now..... just not as awesome as they were. riiiiight sash you're making a ton of sense. sheesh.

i blew mr. promdate off tonight for mr. stupidhead. aren't i smart [sarcasm....]. but i called and apoligized for being a bitch. was that wrong of me to ditch him? i think so. i wouldn't have been any fun, though. im too tired to be fun. im too SAT-ed out. but lets not talk about SATs..... i still feel like a loser. i am a loser. at least i'm aware of it.... BAH. humbug.

my friend has the most adorable kitten ever. it needs a good name. its eyes are just like these huge balls of curiosity. i love it.

2002-05-31T17:23:00.000-07:00

You'll never feel the heat of this soul

my fever burns me deeper than I've ever shown to you

-fiona apple

he asked me today, 'why do you like someone like me? i mean, what is it that you find so attractive about me, anyways?' and i said, 'you know, i ask myself that question quite often.' i could've given him the reasons, but i chose to save it for later. save it for dessert.
once he told me not to bite my nails like he does, because he said it's a bad habbit. low and behold, i now bite my nails.

today was another fun lunch at school. the last 2 fridays have been fun lunches. there was a car show, a barbeque, and a drum circle by the art room, which i more than happily participated in. it was awesome. then my friends brought out a drum set, a base, a guitar and an amp and played some stuff under a tree. a lunch full of good music. full of good food and good times. those are the times that make me happy to be alive and well, despite my headache and sunburn.

i just read a wonderful book: "The Girls Guide to Hunting and Fishing." somewhat of a chick flick, but so good. by melissa bank. read it. also, go to my friend's band's website:
http://i5.nyu.edu/~sla229/Greenwoods.html

everyone have a splendid weekend.

2002-05-28T18:16:00.000-07:00

Everybody's just a stranger but that's the danger in going my own way

I guess that's the price I have to pay

-john mayer

i apoligize for my obsessive quotage of john mayer. i just can't help it. i love that man.

sparknotes.com can die. i just spent far too long trying to become a stupid member just so i could read the summaries for chapters in huck finn, and now i am too tired to read them because i spent so long trying to log in. die, sparknotes, die
.
i hate when you have a terrible day and everyone else has a good one. i hate that stupid things bother me. i hate trying to act like nothing is wrong and then when it gets to you, you are so angry you don't know what to do. yay for my bad mood!!!!! wohoo!

and do you notice how when you get really frustrated, you lose your appitite? or is it just me? it sucks because when i see good food i can't eat it, because im not hungry. poo. poo on everything. bleh.

2002-05-27T19:19:00.000-07:00

"Everyone is different,.... but in the end, we're all fruit."

-quote from the father in the movie "my big fat greek wedding"

that movie is HIGHLY recommended. i laughed until my face hurt.
alex and i came to a conclusion last week: you always seem to want the ones you can't have when someone else wants you. and you can't seem to want that someone else back, however sweet and/or attractive they may be. and there is really no way out of it. and its ANNOYING as hell.
the other day when danielle and i were eating bread and cheese in a park in sonoma, we saw an old couple holding hands and walking their dog together. as they we were walking the old man gave her a kiss. i told danielle "that is EXACTLY what i want to have in my life." they were so cute i almost started crying. i think it would be beautiful to have a marraige that carried you throughout the rest of your life. something like my grandparents had. now that was love.
i wish certain junk food was somewhat healthy. that would be the life.

2002-05-25T15:51:00.000-07:00

Don't let the days go by, glycerine...

Coulda been easier on you, coulda changed if I wanted to

-bush

i LOVE THAT SONG.
one of my favorite feelings: sitting in the car with my dance friends on the way to perform and we are on a long drive, and we are all singing along to an awesome song. gooooood friggan times.
so i went to BOONVILLE last night to perform. yes, thats right, it's called boonville, and it is in the boonies. i think that is really humerous.
and i like bread and cheese. pesto jack cheese to be precise.

2002-05-23T22:39:00.000-07:00

Am I livin' it right?

-john mayer

today at school we had a fantastic water fight during 4th period and the first half of lunch. we threw water balloons and got a little bit out of control when we started dumping buckets of water on each other. it was one of the most fun times i've had at school since freshman year. good times :) it was also nice to be soaking wet on an extremely hot day. however it wasn't so fun going through 6th period algebra 2 in like eskimo weather. oh well.
i can't wait for this 3 day weekend. i can't wait for SLEEP. sleep is my best friend right now.

2002-05-22T19:21:00.000-07:00

He tells me that the best man I will ever find will be attracted to other women. I hear this as another fact I am too old not to know. More proof of how uprepared I am to love anyone.

-from the book "The Girls Guide to Hunting and Fishing" by Melissa Bank

i thought that quote was interesting. i highly recommend that book.
why does she frustrate me so much! she is like one of my greatest friends at school, and she flirts with mr. stupidhead like nobody's business lately. it is ridiculous to me because i am just being a bimbo since i know that they are strictly friends, but it seems like she tries to take away all the attention from him, and is constantly wanting to be around him because he gives her attention. does anyone know what i mean? why does it make me so IRRITATED?! i totally would think i was such a weirdo if i was another person. oye vaye. i need a month of like hardcore yoga or something. that would be exquisite.
jane left :( thank you jane for making me laugh and for always making me happy. we had good times.
i really love music. i love the way the bows of the violins move in unison during my school's band concert. it is beautiful to me. i love how it can help me drown out my anger or brighten my mood. yay for music.
my nose is running :/

2002-05-19T23:21:00.000-07:00

I know I'll see you again, whether far or soon

but I need you to know that I care, and I miss you

-incubus

i am SO DONE with every bit of my stupid term paper project. thank the Lord.
did i meantion that mr. prom date gave me a rose last week at my choir concert? he is so good to me. and i feel like a punk. :( i wish sometimes that i could make myself fall for him. i wonder if i would if mr. stupid head wasn't taking over my heart. i also wonder WHY he is taking over my heart. enough love mushiness.
even though he is a stupid head, i love talking to him [except when we're arguing...actually sometimes that can be interesting, too]. i learn a lot from him, because he is so opininative and analytical but in a very blunt and different and nonchalant way.... he doesn't express it to really anyone except me, but it is a brief expression and he doesn't do anything about it because he doesn't care. i guess that can be a good thing and a bad thing. but it intrigues me, because he says things i wouldn't normally think of, and it makes him unique to me. get my drift? maybe i should try to stop thinking about him so much. sorry, i know i am irritating with this. i irratate myself quite a bit.
the other prom last night was SO much fun. an unbelievable amount of fun. it was a party. fo sho.
i am so ready for sleep.

2002-05-17T22:21:00.000-07:00

I want you to notice when I'm not around

I wish I were special; you're so fuckin special

-radiohead

we won first place in our talent show! 200 buckaroos. booya.
allergies are on the attack. love is on the attack. its a headache. a large and in charge one.
the last couple nights the moon has been perfect, and i love it.
i love mike and i love the fact that he plays piano BEAUTIFULLY. i love his raw talent.
my cat is sitting in my lap :)
we didn't even get to see the velvet teen last night. how lame is that? they went on last and we had to be home early. blast it all.
jane is visiting and i love sharing good old times with her and laughing with her, because its a kind of laugh that we can only share.
hooooooooo boy do i have a lot of homework to finish!
the other prom = tomorrow.
i failed a history test today and didn't do so hot on my math test. UGH.
school = 4 more weeks.
people really suck sometimes. and other times some people are my favorite thing. oh how my dear fluctuating mind works.... bah. humbug.
ewe i just got a porn IM. whoopdeedoo.
that is all for now.

2002-05-13T18:25:00.000-07:00

When I am down and I am blue, all I have to do is close my eyes and think of you,

and the world is new.

-save ferris

i was reading through my journal from half of freshman year that went through last december, and i found this little dilly that i wrote during sophmore year. it was a good pick-me-upper for my melancholy day. so yeah, sorry if you don't like all this poetry stuff i share with you. you're just going to have to put up with it.

You think my outfit is ridiculous-
save me a seat.
My hair is the definition of a bad hair day-
I'll tie lots of ribbons in it.
Mom's dinner was GROSS-
Thank her for feeding you.
My breath smells like fish-
Kiss me.
My shoe is untied-
I'll skip.
I laugh like a donkey-
Tickle me.
I haven't kissed a boy in 2 years-
I kiss my cat every day.
My back hurts-
I'll keep dancing.
I feel fat-
I'll eat some more ice cream.
My brothers drive me nuts-
I'll give them a hug.
So what if life is strange?
Take advantage of it.

2002-05-12T10:42:00.000-07:00

YO 'heart-shape' FRIJOLES

-a sticker on the keyboard from save ferris

the concert was AWESOME! first of all, it was FREE, as in EVERYTHING there including the concert and the drinks and ice cream was FREE. so that is always a bonus. tsunami bomb is sick, and save ferris well that was just like the highlite of my year because i have been in love with them since 7th grade, and we were RIGHT IN YOUR FACE UP FRONT, and i CAUGHT A FREAKING DRUM STICK! and they SIGNED IT afterwards! and dont you love my HARDCORE CAPITALIZATION!
the band after them, i keep forgetting their name, its something weird like Oze Motley or something that generally sounds like that, but they were sooooooo bad ass. it was like a mix between latin/funk/regae/freestyle rap, and they had awesome energy. my friends and i, including the entire crowd, were dancing around like fools the whole time they played. it was the greatest feeling ever. so A+ for yesterday's outside free day-concert.
and the girl that mr. stupid boy took was nice, but super quiet, and i kept my distance [for my own sake] so i didn't get to talk to her very much. i still felt like shit about it, but i didn't let it ruin my day, even though it was on my mind quite a bit [but hey, isn't he always?]. i told him how i felt, like what i wrote in my last blog about how i wish something would happen like it does in the movies, and he said 'you have to realize that i will be going out with other girls.' and 'one day you will get over me.' punk :/ let's hope that day is SOON before i internally COMBUST.
yay for CAPS LOCK.

and happy mother's day. everyone be good to yo mama today.

2002-05-11T00:11:00.000-07:00

Don't look at me this time, be for real and kindly let this lonely soldier be...

Fear, my old friend, disappear...

----the velvet teen----

save ferris show = tomorrow!
the velvet teen concert at the pheonix = 6 days.
another prom = 8 days.
jane comes = 6 days :) weeeeee.
matt eddy made the most delicious steak tonight. and i put the steak in a roll with cheese and lettuce, oh boy, it was a bomb ass sandwich let me tell you that much.
i love the fact that you can still smell the pool on you even if its like 4 hours after you've gone swimming. it's like still being able to smell the beach on you after you've left. ah, the sweet smell of summer is near.....
i am really glad for music. think about how great it is, i mean its obviously one of the most powerful things in the world, because trends come and go, and ideas come and go, and the way people do things come and go, but music is ALWAYS there, no matter what comes and goes. I JUST LOVE IT.
i think it is funny that i write about the same things in every blog. :P heh, sorry.
mr. stupid boy is taking a girl to the save ferris concert tomorrow. i hope i have a friend to bring with me for moral support. :*( i wonder why i let it bug me so easily. i should stop wishing for things that i know can't come true...like how i wish for things to happen like they do in movies: i wish something would happen or i wish that i did something, it doesnt have to be something spectacular, but just SOMETHING to make him realize that he wants to be with me; that i mean something to him. but i know that can't happen. but i wish for it anyways because i am a doofus like that.
and waynes world is a really great movie.

2002-05-10T00:52:00.000-07:00

My stupid mouth has got me in trouble......

I'm never speakin up again, it only hurts me,
I"d rather be a mystery than he desert me....

[^i changed the "she" to "he" so it made sense ^]

why do boys exist? or why does love-gone-bad exist?? take it away please, whoever gave birth to it.
it is 12.40 am. i am not done with my 5 page paper. oh wow.
i am really feeling like a big stupid loser right now and i find it rather IRRITATING that i am so incapable of dealing with my uncontrollable emotions. i feel like a fish who can't teach itself to swim and even though it keeps trying it just sinks deeper every time. then when it finally gains control something DUMB happens and it sinks again. that is a stupid metaphor but that was what popped into my head... and all of these lyrics i posted remind me of myself. john mayer is my #1 man on my list. this stupid boy that is making my head spin is last on my list........actually i just want him to be last on my list. im not strong enough to put him there, though :/ SOMEBODY SLAP ME! arrrrrrrgh.
im considering purchasing a largh punching bag in the very near future.

.....One more thing, why's it my fault?

-john mayer

2002-05-06T21:51:00.000-07:00

I wana run through the halls in high school

I wana scream at the top of my lungs -----

so i got used to my hair at prom. i decided not to let it ruin my night. and i had a very wonderful time. and my date was great. for the last dance they played a frank sinatra song, and it was the perfect ending. so yay for prom :)
and a girl puked in our limo! it reeked.
so....homework?? yeah.... anyone want to write a 5 page english essay for me? common, you know you want to, all the cool people are doing it. but im not cool, so thats why i want YOU to do it for me!
will this maddness ever end? right now i am not too encouraged that it will.
MY POOL IS GETTING FINISHED ON FRIDAY. hallelujah.
there are certain boys in life. there are boys who will lie to you, and boys who will make you feel like a princess, and boys who will like you when you dont like them, and boys who wont like you when you like them, boys who make you cry for all of the smallest reasons, boys who are uterly clueless, boys who you like on and off and just straight up make your mind go in circles because of it, boys who play guitar beautifully, and then there is my cat. i love my cat and she loves me, and that makes me happy. maybe i will just save myself from the pain and marry my cat.

2002-05-04T16:13:00.000-07:00

Nobody's romancin 'cause it's too early for dancin'

but here comes the music...

i am in a bad mood on prom night.
i got my makeup and hair done and i strongly dislike them both. why didn't i just do it myself? well my friend that is a very good question. and now i feel like poo. i am considering jumping in the shower....
and the worst part is that even if everyone else hates it, they'll still say 'oh you look soooo cute!' because that is what people say to each other when they are dressed up, even if they really look ridiculous.
do you ever wonder what people say about you when you're not there? i was talking to someone the other night about this dancer who we think is the most increadible person ever, and my friend said 'do you think she knows that everyone loves her? and does she know that anyone, no matter the sex, wants to have sex with her?' now everyone will say this when they are talking about me: 'yah you know that girl sasha, the one who had the goofy hairdo at prom??...' ARRRRRGH!
help :*(

2002-04-29T19:24:00.000-07:00

Who loves the sun? Who cares that it makes plants grow?

Who cares what it does since you broke my heart?

prom countdown - 5 DAYS. oh boy
there is something that i hate and that something is called homework.
i think that no one lives in the present anymore. everyone just lives for the future, for the planned dates and opportunities ahead of them. but isn't that what we're supposed to live for? but shouldnt you live for right now, too? life is just a complicated thing, isn't it. no more analyzing for sasha.
favorite movie of the week: wedding singer and princess bride
favorite music of the week: sublime [as of today], and old greenday [as of yesterday, and as in the dookie cd]
i hope it doesnt rain tomorrow.

2002-04-26T16:46:00.000-07:00

When the pretty girl walks, she walks so proud

and when the pretty girl laughs, oh man, she laughs so loud

-jack johnson

math insult of the day, said by a boy in my class: "hey zack, i've got 2 words for you: 'negative reciprocal.'"
i love my math class.
i love fridays, but i hate it when i come home and am SO unmotivated to finish my homework early, and then i can't think of anything to do because i have no money.
things that suck: being bankrupt and having a buttload of homework.
i hate the feeling when you want something SO BAD but you don't know what it is and then you are just stuck sitting there wanting to fly through the roof because you are frustrated that you can't find what you want. i think it might be a kiss. but i dont know. a kiss would be nice, though, even if that isn't what i want so bad. argh.

and now, for your reading pleasure, a lovely poem written by my friend to my other friend:

look at me again, let me feel the warmth of your smile
in the midst of pouring rain
when we're together i'm in a state of bliss
whereas apart i feel the pain
too worried perhaps you don't feel for me
and it cuts me a thousand ways
i will cross troubled waters to get to you
if only i could touch your face
hold me underneath a blanket of stars
and secure me with serenity
be the light that shines through darkness
show me that you belong to me
for only the ink and this sheet
are my instruments to subdue
the way my heart sings these words
this is my poetry for you.

2002-04-25T22:32:00.000-07:00

Oh and in your eyes I see what's on my mind

-dave matthews band

something funny my friend zack said yesterday after we switched seats in math:
"i love sitting in the back row, there's so much more privacy, i mean now i can do things that i wouldn't normally do in class....... like.... my homework."
i dont know if you understand, but i was laughing REALLY hard when he said it. i love zack.
my grandma is coming up to visit tomorrow :) i am really excited.
i love the feeling when you get out of the shower and you are all clean and fresh and your hair is halfway between wet and dry and you can still smell the shampoo and it feels soft and cold on your back. lovliness.
and the moon was perfect tonight.
bonsoir

2002-04-24T18:53:00.000-07:00

Further long, we just may

but for now it's just another lonely day

i am done with my term paper. amen. i think im going to throw myself a party.

today was a very interesting and hard day. we had the 'every 15 minutes' program at our school, and today was the fake memorial service for the students that 'died every 15 minutes from being under the influence of alchohol' [they got taken out of school every 15 minutes throughout the day before]. some of them read letters to their parents and some of the parents read letters to their kids. there was no way i could've held in my tears. and there is no way i am ever going to drink and drive or let anyone else do so. it made a lot of people realize how important their family is to them as well as their friends. after the assembly my brother came up and gave me a hug. this program, though it was kind of hokey at times, is something every high school needs to see.

prom countdown: 1 week and 3 days
dress status: none. please help.

and to end the day, a quote from ani:
"I owe my life to the people that I love."

2002-04-22T17:52:00.000-07:00

And I don't want the world to see me, cause I dont think that they'd understand

oye vay. its hot.
the perfect cure for a hot day: a big glass of ice water and a BIG bowl of fresh strawberries that have been sitting in the fridge all day. perfection.
i am more than halfway done with my term paper. thank you, thank you, hold your applause.

do you ever wonder how strange it is that a person is born into the world with a main purpose to go to school and get a job? and that is how you base the rest of your life, around school and your career. and when you die, some people will only remember you for how good of a doctor you were, or what a fantastic amount of money you made as an accountant or an actor. isnt that weird? i think it kind of sucks. when my grandpa died, i remembered him as being the most wonderful person ever.

never fear, summer is near.....

2002-04-20T18:30:00.000-07:00

Hakunamatata

what a wonderful phrase

i love how when i am listening to music and working on the computer my dad will come in and turn on the TV really loud so it drains out my music.
I LOVE THE VELVET TEEN! i went to their concert at the pheonix last night, and wow it was just FANTASTIC. it was one of those feelings where you are totally into the music, like you are in a different world, and you are completely happy with everything, even if there is some sticky business going on in your life, but you dont really care right then, because at that moment you are happy. i love that feeling :) everyone go to www.thevelvetteen.com and buy their cd.
i didn't find the dress in the city. >:\ i think i might need to go to prom naked.

2002-04-18T22:07:00.000-07:00

I am hanging on every word you say and even if you don't want to speak tonight that's alright, alright with me

'cause I want nothin more than to sit outside Heaven's door and listen to you breathing

i hate the feeling when you say something that may come out wrong or stupid and the other person looks at you or responds to you like you are from another planet and then you feel really ...... blah.
my lips are chapped and my skin is dry and my head is exploding and my heart is tired.
the clouds tonight were bright pink, then they turned purple, then they turned light blue as the sun set and they blended in with the sky. i absolutely loved it.
i am going to the city tomorrow to look for a prom dress. wish me luck.

2002-04-17T18:39:00.000-07:00

Will we burn in heaven like we do down here?

-sarah mclachlan

there are days when i wish i could throw my computer down in the dirt and savagely beat it with a baseball bat.
it makes me feel so good inside when there is a wonderful sunset or a pretty moon outside. nature is a lovely thing.
prom countdown: 2 weeks and 3 days dress status: none plans: none
i am in somewhat of a love triangle and it is somewhat difficult to escape. hmmm.... further details will be given later on.
i will leave you with a joke that my friend told today and it made me laugh really hard [and i hope you are not getting the wrong message from me telling this joke because i am not racist :) ]
-i'm not racist, i own a color TV!- hahahaha

2002-04-14T13:39:00.000-07:00

And tomorrow its back to bein friends, but tonight we're lovers

-dave matthews band

i wish that it was that easy, to just be lovers for one night and then the next day you could just go right back to being friends and nothing more. that would be nice. but in a way it wouldn't.... whatever.
picture this : you are on stage, sitting/singing for 62 minutes or more, hardcore hot bright lights beaming in your face, no air conditioning, in a hot sticky thick velvet UGLY choir dress. that was my weekend.
i think i need to start widening my vocabulary. im getting sick of my words. they're getting overplayed.
on the way home today i was looking at the hills and they looked SO pretty because they were so green and there were purple sploches of flowers and the grass was blowing and it looked so soft in the wind and i just wanted to lay down in it, like that part in alice in wonderland where she is lying down and singing in tall grass. well anyways it was beautiful. and the vinyards on the hills look like acupuncture.

2002-04-12T15:58:00.000-07:00

One day I'm gona lose the war

-bradley nowell

i HATE porn mail. it is stupid, annoying, and way out of control. it just needs to STOP finding its way into my mailbox.
i actually enjoyed reading my history book last night. it was about the beginning of world war II, and normally i hate learning about wars, but it was really interesting, because it wasn't about all the killings and stuff.
you know.... as hectic as my life is, and as much as little things really bug me, and as little sleep as i have been getting lately, and as much as i complain about all these things, i have concluded that i have an awesome life. props to the big man up there.
have you ever wondered if there was really an end to the sky??? it is just so weird to me that you are basically looking up into oblivion...like....you are looking at a solid color, but its not actually 'solid' at all, and there is absolutely no end to it...and if there was no gravity you would just keep falling into the sky....hmmmmm...its hard to explain. well anyways theres some food for thought.

2002-04-09T16:03:00.000-07:00

You're tryin' my shoes on for a change, they look so good but feel so strange,

out of fashion so I can't complain

-no doubt

i know i've said it before, but i have the best friends in the entire world. i am a lucky girl.
'he' was mad today because the girl he 'dumped me for' gave him a bad look. heh, i wonder what he'd do if i gave him a bad look. probably nothing. why do i even worry about it.... and why does it still make me sad? :/
i am having wade withdrawals already. must...dance...aieeee
favorite singing voices: taylor hanson, john mayer, ben harper, bradly nowell from sublime, nate from private selection, judah from the velvet teen, G Love [even though hes kind of hip-hoppish], thats it for now. come back next time.

2002-04-06T02:11:00.000-08:00

We all need to learn to love ourselves before its made illegal

-incubus [sorry if i quoted that wrong]

it is official. i am in love. with a man named wade robson. thats right. he really is a walking orgasm. im sorry if that sonds disgusting but if you saw him dance you'd understand. if he stood one foot in front of you and danced next to you, you would understand.... oye vay. it was a nice breather today, just to dance my hardest, get all my anger out and everything. its good therapy. and i love wade. oh wow.
i love my friends. and i wish my grandma wasn't so alone. but today i was happy. really, really happy. thank you, you've been great tonight, goodnight. or rather good morning....

2002-04-03T11:54:00.000-08:00

So live your life, and just be yourself

It doesn't matter if its good enough for someone else

-jimmy eat world

i like that jimmy eat world quote becuase it is uplifting to me in my time of post relationship sulking.

the river is a fun place to go. filled with fun and good times. my prom date took me to the river yesterday. he has the PRETTIEST house i've ever seen. its all victorian and wooden and fresh. its just spectacular.

i enjoy skipping rocks. and 'amelie' is the greatest movie i've ever seen. she skips rocks in that movie. i skipped rocks at the river yesterday. i wasn't very good at it though.

2002-03-31T20:20:00.000-08:00

I can do what I want to do, and if it don't do no harm then it shouldn't bother you

you can be who you want to be, and if it don't do no harm then it's alright with me

-ben harper

i love music!!!!!!! aieeeee
happy easter! my brothers and i had a big egg hunt this morning :) i love egg hunts, they are just the greatest childhood memories ever. i loved easter at my old house. those were the days...
being at the beach makes me happy. even if it is cloudy. it is very relaxing and just happy. i love the sound of the waves. i think it is one of my favorite sounds.
dont you think its funny when you are listening to the radio and singing along to a song, and then you see someone in a different car singing along to the same song? i think its humerous.
my prom date called me last night :)
my allergies are on the attack. dun dun dunnnnn.

2002-03-30T18:30:00.000-08:00

"We thought you was a TTOOOAD"

-"oh brother, where art thou?"

never fear, SPRING BREAK IS HERE
today was a really pretty day.
we have dafodills in our back yard!!! yipee
i have a prom date :)
we went to the beach yesterday and cooked hot dogs over a fire. it was fun. i love having good friends.
you know what is a really cute song? this one. i just think the lyrics are appropriate for a lot of things in my life:
"you are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray, you'll never know, dear, how much i love you, please don't take my sunshine away."

2002-03-25T21:16:00.000-08:00

I got no secret purpose, I don't seem obvoius do I?

The dj never has it, J M C automatic

-jimmy eat world

--countdowns--
spring break countdown: 4 days!
wade robson class in l.a. countdown: 11 days
velvet teen concert countdown: 3 weeks and 4 days
prom countdown: 5 weeks and 5 days
summer countdown: 11 weeks and 4 days [81 days...far too long of a wait for me]

does anyone want to explain my math homework to me? and does anyone want to explain to me WHEN in my life i am ever going to need to use this useless information? please? :/ 4 more days.....

2002-03-22T23:37:00.000-08:00

"I want to date a musician."

-"high fidelity"

my brother's friend lindsay and i sat in my brothers room and watched him, nick, and jeremy goof around on the banjo, guitar and bass for like an hour strait without saying a word. it was hypnotizing. i love music.
things i hate at the moment:
zits, stupid drivers, allergies, homework, headaches, being lied to, being in bad moods when everyone else is in a good one, feeling lonely, being bankrupt, being cold, seeing your once organized notecards hardcore scattered in front of you
things i love at the moment:
my cat, sleeping, laughing, music, just RELAXING, watching movies, being with my friends

2002-03-21T15:39:00.000-08:00

You can take the road that takes you to the stars, I can take the road that will set me free

we had a mosh pit at our school today during battle of the bands! well a teacher pulled the plug, but still, that is like legendary. good memories...
taylor and i got caught coming back from being off campus yesterday during our free period [we had choir, but our teacher gave us a free period to study and do whatever]. they had to search our backpacks and they put us on 'no roam policy,' which means we can NEVER leave class, EVER, not even to go to the bathroom, and if we're caught, we get suspended. is that legal for them to search our backpacks? and i hardly ever cut. can we say KARMA.
i wish things were easy. it would be nice just to have everything go away for a while so i could just BREATH.

2002-03-19T19:30:00.000-08:00

I cant think coz I'm just way too tired

-the strokes

um....homework overload. yeah...kinda sucks. you know what? i love music. it is my life saver. the end. if i don't marry a singer/songwriter/musician, i am going to be very disappointed.
the present:
present feeling: tired,stressed and really, really EMPTY
present random thought: how easy it is to ditch at my school, and i think i am getting acne
present music: lauri's acoustic cd. AMEN.
present love: john mayer songs on lauri's acoustic cd
present drink: tangerine juice
present state of being: tired of being heartbroken, and i miss my friends and family in l.a.

2002-03-17T22:01:00.000-08:00

I fell in love cause you crushed me with your hands

and you put my brain in overload

-radiohead

he is a liar and a bastard. so why do i bother? because i know he's better than that, and it irritates me. damn it all. i want to throw something REALLY large and destructive at a numerous brick walls, numerous times.
i just wish he understood.

2002-03-16T00:25:00.000-08:00

I'll hide in my bedroom staying up all night just to write a love song for no one

-john mayer

there is someone who i love, and her name is nicole, because i know that if we don't talk for a month we will still love each other just the same as we always have, and that makes me really happy :) friends are what keep me going. what keep me sane. what keep me from throwing large, breakable objects at things when im angry.
i went to a concert tonight. just a local band concert. even though some of the music is a bit too hardcore for me, its cool to see how much everyone can get into it, just like completely induldge in the music, you know? it can help you take your mind off some bothersome things [i.e. stupid boys....]. and by the way im sorry if you are a male, its nothing personal, dont worry ;]

2002-03-14T22:39:00.000-08:00

I don't belong here...'cause I'm a creep....

...i want to have control, i want a perfect body, i want a perfect soul....

-radiohead

scott burned me the most awesome radiohead cd. even though he broke my heart, he makes a DAMN good mix.
i have been internet shopping [well not buying, just looking] on girlshop.com, and oh my goodness, i love sexy underwear. i must have some soon. along with a hundred other things on that website. too bad i am BANKRUPT! i HATE money.

2002-03-13T15:48:00.000-08:00

You give me Fever

jane sent me 2 cards. one says:
"Honey, a man is like a slinky.....not good for much, but you can't help but smile when one tumbles down a flight of stairs."
the other one says:
"Just a little note to say, I'm here for you......naked....with a can of whipped cream."
i laughed a lot :-) thanks jane. go look at her blog: www.psiloveyou.blogspot.com

i wrote something last night. im not finished, but this was the outcome:::
in any infinate number of days
i could learn to flip pancakes
or perfect scrambled eggs
but i think it will take more than a few
to learn to get over someone like you.
i could cry till my tears are painted black,
like the sky out my window,
like the love that i lack.
but visible tears come and go as days go by
while on the inside they never breath so much as a sigh.

thank you and goodnight.

2002-03-11T19:08:00.000-08:00

I do it for the joy that it brings, coz I'm a joyful girl

this world owes me nothing, we owe each other the world

-once again, ani [that would be a cool senior quote huh? well i think so anyways...lauri gave me that idea...yay for lauri]

so....i did homework from 9.30 until now today, and i am still not finished. sounds like fun, huh?
i like carrots. i like the sound when you bite into them. but i dont like how they always get stuck in my throat.
i can't wait to be able to call someone 'the love of my life' and REALLY mean it from the bottom of my heart... wouldn't that be awesome? well i've got plenty of time to find one [i hope]....

2002-03-10T22:11:00.000-08:00

I had a dream with your face in it that scares me awake

I put too much on the table, now I've got too much at stake

-ani difranco

i really really love ani. quite a bit. i love the lyrics and the voice and the feeling and just the music in general. i just love her. yes indeedee.
so this weekend...yay for dance! it was fabulous. awesome teachers, awesome choreography, awesome weekend. i have a terrible headache, bruises in strange places and my entire body is sore [even the front part of my neck... i didnt even know you could be sore there..?? and i can't massage it because i like choke myself if i do, it sucks], but i dont really care, because it shows that I WORKED DAMN HARD!!! can i get a woop woop? oh my, i'm so white... anyways.... it was good just to get away from everything for a weekend and kind of dance my troubles away. good to let out some of my anger and stuff like that... you know? kinda hard to explain unless you are a dancer....but it was a nice releasing feeeling :) i am now ready TO SLEEP.

2002-03-07T21:38:00.000-08:00

Please tell me you're just feeling tired

cause if its more than that, i feel that i might break

since things have been rather dull and depressing on my dear little blog here lately, i decided to perk things up a bit and leave you with a feel-good poem for the weekend. i was tired of feeling like shit, so i wanted to whip up some happy thoughts and jot them down to make me feel better [momentarily, anyways...]. its just a little somethin somethin i felt like writing at like 11 pm last night, so nothing special, butanyways, i'll be off dancing in san jose saturday-sunday., so have a splendid weekend.

what a feeling it is
to be happy!
to taste the sun
sizzling on my face.
to hear a beautiful song.
a feel-good song.
to shower my tired, run-down body.
to be able to sink into
my undying friendships
effortlessly; thoughtlessly.
to love my mother so much it hurts.
to smile and mean it.
what a feeling
to be listening to a song that serenates
my unexplainable thoughts.
to indulge in a good bowl of ice cream.
to laugh out loud repeatedly.
to feel safe in a nice, long hug.
to dance; to release.
to lay down in a comfortable bed
when my body aches; when all my head contains are dead batteries.
to hear someone say, "you are beautiful;
you look good today; you are a great friend;
i love you."
to be kissed.
to smell the ocean under my nose.
to have God on my side.
to swallow raindrops and candy.
to love.
what a feeling it is
to be happy!

2002-03-06T19:32:00.000-08:00

Jack and Jill went up the hill to sell some marijuana

-ziggy marley

and for the record, i dont smoke, but i took this funny little test here and it made me think of that quote:

feel good music: dave matthews band.
today i was driving home from dance in the rain, feeling TIRED and kind of gloomy, but then i was listening to an awesome dave matthews song, and i remembered this one time last year at the beginning of summer when i was driving with my windows down, music blasting, and it was sunny outside, and i smiled realllly big because i felt SO GOOD inside during that one moment. just really happy to be alive. it was beautiful. that was a lovely moment.

2002-03-05T17:30:00.000-08:00

Cause when you get so close I run and hide

close your eyes, count backwards

it is a rainy day, and i am gloomy. gloomy like the grey outside. and its cold in my house. cold like my refridgerater. don't you love my similes.
my eyes seem very blue today. do you ever notice that? how some days your eyes can look a lot brighter than normal? its kinda cool.
favorite snack: choclate covered soy nuts
things of the present---
present state of mind: tired, headache, and gloomy.
present thoughts: still not getting over that stupid boy and thinking about how im never going to finish my homework
present love: music, ice cream, the moon, the beach, massages, and sleep

2002-03-03T21:59:00.000-08:00

Sweet like candy to my soul

I AM SO TIRED. 4 hours and 15 minutes of dance today, 3 hours yesterday. BRING IT ON. i like can't move my neck, my back, my legs, or my arms....basically my entire body. its great. i kind of like the feeling after you've worked out really hard though, its like you have accomplished something beyond your limit, and you're like 'yeah, look at me, im strong.'
i think that if music just disappeared one day, i would disappear with it. i don't think i could possibly go on without it. well maybe i could...i'd just be a little bit CRAZY. i will be a little bit CRAZY when i will be getting no sleep during march or april. hoooooo boy, yay for school. yay for 50 history notecards. and, last but not least, YAY FOR SLEEP. the end.

2002-03-01T23:57:00.000-08:00

Why did we ever meet

favorites list:
favorite thing of the month: the moon and the stars at the beach
favorite place to go relax: the beach, danielle's house, or aroma roasters coffee shop
favorite feeling: the sun, it reminds me of summer
favorite cd: the velvet teen cd

april and march = the months of my doom. choir rehearsals/dance rehearsals [which occasionally overlap], history term paper, and 2 english projects. can we say stress???
i miss my boyfriend. things would be a lot easier if i could just run away for a while... maybe i'll go to the beach.... yeah, i wish. :-(

2002-02-24T17:46:00.000-08:00

And I can smell a pinch of hope to almost have allowed one's fingers to stroke

- bjork

you know what bugs me? when you have dreams that make you feel soo good when you are dreaming them, like completely happy and content and beautiful, and then when you wake up you just feel like you want to cry because you remember that it was just a dream. i have been having those every night for almost 2 weeks straight. and its no party, let me tell you.
i love the word 'beautiful.' but i hate how so many things can contradict it. not only the word, but the feeling and the physicalness of it. i hate how i can never explain things! aieeee
three cheers for homework. hip hip, up my ass! .....

2002-02-24T17:26:00.000-08:00

My Mormon name is Saysha Candelon!
What's yours?

2002-02-23T13:13:00.000-08:00

In these few hours a breath of summertime has turned to winter rain

-lamb

i have serious issues with homework.
i really love my friends. i think i have the greatest friends in the entire world. my friday night was completely fulfilled by just sitting down and talking to friends for hours. i can say whatever is on my mind and not be scared of rejection. and i love them for that. even lately when i am being a grumpy loser they will still put up with me and listen to me cry. i hope i am a good friend to my friends. and i love my family. i am so lucky. thank you to everyone who is reading this who are my friends. you have made my life beautiful.
i hate how his feelings for me left him. they just disappeared. why does this seem so unfair
the end.

2002-02-21T22:14:00.000-08:00

Sleep with all the sheets off, bearing your mattress, bearing your soul....

.....I'd like to see you undone - dashboard confessional

i was driving to school this morning and saw some things that interested me. first, i saw this man who lives down the street doing some kind of power walking down the street by the lake with weights in his hands. further down the street, i saw an older man walking with his cane and just looking at the lake. then i thought to myself: isn't it strange how as a child you take walks to feed your curiosity and to release excess energy; after that you take walks to excercise or to pass the time, and as you get older you take walks simply to enjoy the view? i think everyone should take walks every once in a while and feel grateful for the scenery surrounding them. i'm going to take a walk this weekend.

2002-02-20T19:58:00.000-08:00

What's your favorite dish?

I'm not gonna cook it but I'll order it from SANZABAR! - tenacious D

i think i spelled tenacious wrong...??? oh well.
i really really HATE Homework. with all of my heart i hate it. i especially despise essays. essays can die.
he said everything just fit with us. he said he missed my smell. why is he so clueless!! seriously, i really think there is something in a female brain that is missing from the male brain. aiieeeee. i have an idea!: let's embrace to the Lord and feel alright. - bob marley

2002-02-17T10:52:00.000-08:00

I'm tired of bein alone

so hurry up and get here

you know whats really sad? when you get on aol, it says 'you've got mail!', so you get all excited, especially when you're expecting mail from someone, so you go to check your mail, and all the mail you've got is porn junk. that is really dissapointing to me.
i hate how you can tell someone something, and mean it with every peice of your heart, and they still would never understand how much it meant to you, or how much they meant to you. it's just really frustrating to me.
everyone listen to the velvet teen. i highly recommend them.
i am going snowboarding today. i have no energy, too much homework, and a hole in my heart. i hate how i cant stop the hole from growing.

crash into me

I'm trying to keep my feet on the ground, I'm getting to like this feeling I've found

Won't you take me by the hand, take me somewhere new

I shit you not. There is no poop coming out of here right now

Back to you, it always comes around

Break Away

And tomorrow it's back to bein friends, but tonight we're lovers

Let tomorrow come and take my time away

My fever burns me deeper than I've ever shown to you

Won't you take me by the hand, take me somewhere new

Ain't no sunshine when she's gone

Stop looking at me swan.

Didn't have a camera by my side this time

I don't want that kind of forever in my life anymore

Here's a toast to all those who knew me all too well

Dream is destiny

Take a shower and shine your shoes, you got no time to lose

Forgive me love, I can't turn and walk away

Close your eyes, count backwards

I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

Viva la Mexico

Wake me up before you go go, don't leave me hangin' on like a yo yo

One time I drank too much cough syrup and everything turned blue

It's just a big party is what this is all is.... except we're the people on the deck 'cause that's where the cool mothafuckers hang out

Would you want me when I'm not myself?

You could never be a vegetable. Even artichokes have hearts.

There's no such thing as brass nails, is there?

Tell me somethin good

Can't buy me love, everbody tells me so

And I'm thinkin what a mess we're in

I'm leavin on a jet plane; don't know when I'll be back again

-"Can you Move?" -"Move? You're alive. If you want, I can fly."

See I may have faith to make mountains fall

Dream as if you'll live forever...

And you put my brain in overload

"I am very very sneaky"

When I am down and I am blue, all I have to do is close my eyes and think of you

Royal oil common bubble and boil, slap a dagger make you stagger like a hot tin foil

sometimes in order to see the light, we have to risk the dark

Would you be my Forever?

This magic moment, it took my by surprise

You can't get in the way of what I'm feelin

Back to you, it always comes around, back to you, I try to forget you, I try to stay away, but it's too late

Wish I could frame you and this feeling on the wall to stare at 'til there is no time

It could all be so simple, but you'd rather make it hard. Loving you is like a battle, and we both end up with scars

There's only us, there's only this, forget regret, or life is yours to miss

Fantasy is what we want, but Reality is what we need

Lost for you I'm so lost for you, for me, come and crash into me

Maybe someday I will tell you when I'm in the mood to lose my way

The clock never stops, never stops, never waits

You'll never feel the heat of this soul

Everybody's just a stranger but that's the danger in going my own way

"Everyone is different,.... but in the end, we're all fruit."

Don't let the days go by, glycerine...

Am I livin' it right?

He tells me that the best man I will ever find will be attracted to other women. I hear this as another fact I am too old not to know. More proof of how uprepared I am to love anyone.

I know I'll see you again, whether far or soon

I want you to notice when I'm not around

When I am down and I am blue, all I have to do is close my eyes and think of you,

YO 'heart-shape' FRIJOLES

Don't look at me this time, be for real and kindly let this lonely soldier be...

My stupid mouth has got me in trouble......

I wana run through the halls in high school

Nobody's romancin 'cause it's too early for dancin'

Who loves the sun? Who cares that it makes plants grow?

When the pretty girl walks, she walks so proud

Oh and in your eyes I see what's on my mind

Further long, we just may

And I don't want the world to see me, cause I dont think that they'd understand

Hakunamatata

I am hanging on every word you say and even if you don't want to speak tonight that's alright, alright with me

Will we burn in heaven like we do down here?

And tomorrow its back to bein friends, but tonight we're lovers

One day I'm gona lose the war

You're tryin' my shoes on for a change, they look so good but feel so strange,

We all need to learn to love ourselves before its made illegal

So live your life, and just be yourself

I can do what I want to do, and if it don't do no harm then it shouldn't bother you

"We thought you was a TTOOOAD"

I got no secret purpose, I don't seem obvoius do I?

-"Can you Move?"
-"Move? You're alive. If you want, I can fly."